MOLI VIEW™

One of the good things about the Haumana is that the staff and crew are largely Tahitian (as opposed to French with Tahitians only in housekeeping). This includes the skipper, named Porio, a complete wild man who would make for spectacular prime-time television. He's dark-skinned, wiry, and about four feet tall with a face like a chocolate pug. He has one outfit: red board shorts, a hunter-green tank, and a little yellow and black cap like cyclists wear in the Tour de France. He came with the guests on all of our boat excursions and often became the focus of them, for better or worse.

Another crew member warned me that Porio had to be watched at all times. First there was the problem of his excessive drinking, which explained some of his crazed behavior. I was told this was dealt with a couple of weeks before I arrived by taking him to church to sign a decree in front of a priest that he would never booze again (or he'd go directly to hell).

Then, Porio was girl crazy. He was always trying to get me to sit close to him, or actually on him, in the boat. Really liked the ladies. All shapes, sizes, and ages, including ones as young as 12 or 13. "I can never take my eyes off him," said the hotel director. "Not for one minute."

Creepy, yes, but every now and again, Porio really came in handy. Like when he lit a coconut husk fire to ward off mosquitoes, or weaved a palm frond mat to sit on, or cut open a green coconut to drink, or when the ocean got a bit rough and someone needed to rescue a drifting tender or anchor that had come loose. He was more than happy to get in danger's way and, as someone born and raised on Rangiroa, he was often the best qualified. He organically knew everything about the atoll's geography, ocean currents, weather patterns, where all the best beaches were, and where to find land and sea creatures that wowed the guests.

Previous Page  1  2  3  Next Page