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The Final Barry Reference
Bonds's spectacle has been pure punk
If — after this posting — I ever again type the word "Bonds" for non-personal consumption, you best believe my writing has taken a turn toward financial reporting. Similar promises have come out of my mouth before, but this time I mean them. Barry Bonds hit No. 756 today. It's in the unspoken Sportswriter's Code that today we all have to write about the San Francisco home run king.
Oddly, upon learning that Barry Bonds broke Henry Aaron's all-time homer mark, my thoughts turned to light-hitting infielders. Back in the back of the day, while preparing to co-author Bonds's ill-fated autobiography, I'd consulted the sportswriter who was then ghostwriting a book about steroids that would become famous. The two of us were in agreement that the left-fielder was juicing.
"Thing is," my colleague told me, "most often steroids aren't used by big strong guys like Barry. Most of baseball's 'roid cases are skinny second basemen trying to get from 15 homers to 20 homers each year." While not the behemoth we see before us today, Bonds was always a long, lean, powerful guy.
Could it be that Barry's not getting fair props for being a breaker of stereotypes? Maybe I've not given this man his due!
Sheeeit…
Man, listen. Let's pretend for a few short graphs that I never had a million-dollar deal to write Barry's autobiography. Let's pretend that, for the past five years I haven't taken every opportunity possible to exact retribution in print for what I feel is BALCO-driven opting out. Let's make like all the vitriol is gone.
I give him credit, along with Jose Canseco, for providing baseball with a much-needed enema. As Gene Wojciechowski wrote at ESPN.com, "[Commissioner Bud] Selig has looked like he'd rather be doing anything — giving congressional testimony ... going to the Westminster Dog Show with Michael Vick — than wait for Bonds to hit No. 756."
Oddly, upon learning that Barry Bonds broke Henry Aaron's all-time homer mark, my thoughts turned to light-hitting infielders. Back in the back of the day, while preparing to co-author Bonds's ill-fated autobiography, I'd consulted the sportswriter who was then ghostwriting a book about steroids that would become famous. The two of us were in agreement that the left-fielder was juicing.
"Thing is," my colleague told me, "most often steroids aren't used by big strong guys like Barry. Most of baseball's 'roid cases are skinny second basemen trying to get from 15 homers to 20 homers each year." While not the behemoth we see before us today, Bonds was always a long, lean, powerful guy.
Could it be that Barry's not getting fair props for being a breaker of stereotypes? Maybe I've not given this man his due!
Sheeeit…
Man, listen. Let's pretend for a few short graphs that I never had a million-dollar deal to write Barry's autobiography. Let's pretend that, for the past five years I haven't taken every opportunity possible to exact retribution in print for what I feel is BALCO-driven opting out. Let's make like all the vitriol is gone.
I give him credit, along with Jose Canseco, for providing baseball with a much-needed enema. As Gene Wojciechowski wrote at ESPN.com, "[Commissioner Bud] Selig has looked like he'd rather be doing anything — giving congressional testimony ... going to the Westminster Dog Show with Michael Vick — than wait for Bonds to hit No. 756."
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15:01 EDT, 17.Aug.07