Dear Theo,

I've had a near 15-year relationship with BOB --
my battery-operated boyfriend. That's more continuity than I've had
with any real man. I've heard from other women and noticed myself that
as a result, it’s harder to orgasm during sex when there
is a real flesh-and-bone man in my bed. My BOB is so strong, steady,
and powerful, and you know, the real guys just aren't as ... reliable
(!). Any tips on how to have the best of both worlds?

Thanks,

Ms. "Good Vibrations"


Dear Ms. Good Vibrations,

Many
women, as you know, have long-lasting relationships with a BOB and many
bring that BOB into their real live relationships. There’s nothing
wrong or strange about bringing a toy into the mix with a human.
Sometimes with a human it takes more time to get the chemistry
happening, unlike with the BOB, where it’s a given. Human chemistry can
sometimes happen in an instant, but often times it takes a lot more
work. If you can, be patient with the human for he is not a machine.

You
asked about tips for the best of both worlds, so if you are dating,
don’t be shy; bring your BOB into the mix. It will certainly be more
orgasmic for you, and you deserve it. If the dude can’t handle it,
well, he’ll have to work harder with your instruction to get things
right (if you have the patience) or you can move on to someone else.
Lots, and I mean lots, of women incorporate toys into their
relationships I assure you; please do not be timid. It is your born
right to get the most enjoyment you can out of sex. I understand if you
feel a little uneasy about busting out your BOB in a brand new
situation, but it can’t hurt to get the cards on the table. Plus, with
a fun, open guy (long-lasting relationship or not), it will literally
and figuratively only add to the good vibes. Go get yourself some extra
batteries to have on hand and an underwater BOB so you're ready for
some summer lovin'!

Theo Kogan is the MOLI View's contributing editor for Fashion & Design. Her THEOlogy column appears Tuesdays and Thursdays. Every other Thursday, she answers your questions with her tough-love advice. Send your questions via e-mail or here on MOLI